Wednesday 23 March 2016

Alice Down the Pot-hole

T of TW March 2016


Alice in Wonderland World of Pot-holed Roads
By Kent Barker

The answer that came back over and over again was simply “there is no money for it”.  It didn’t much matter what the question was.  The response was the same.  We’re sitting over coffee in the newly refurbished Village Shop and Café - four members of my parish council’s Highways Committee and three people from Kent County Council’s Roads and Travel Department, two whom are officers and the third a senior elected member.
Now the appalling state of the highways around here is of considerable interest to many.  In fact ‘interest’ is hardly the right word.  Even ‘incandescent fury’ might not be strong enough.  Few can remember when any road was fully re-surfaced.  Patched yes, but actually planning off the top tarmac and relaying a whole new surface? Well it simply doesn’t happen any more.  Hasn’t done so for years.  And each winter the pot-holes get bigger, and after enough people have broken wheels or springs and have inundated the council with complaints, then a team may come along with some lose ‘blackstuff’ on the back of a lorry and chuck it in the hole and flatten it in a desultory sort of way.  Sure it evens things out for a bit.  But then the telephone people or the water people turn up and dig a trench and don’t fill it in properly, or a succession of those huge ‘Chelsea tractor’ 4x4s churn it up, or the frost gets to it and, before you know it, you are not just back where you started, but worse off even than that. And just don’t get me started on what it’s like for cyclists on the national bicycle ‘route’ that runs through the parish.  We used to have a joke when we were doing our cycling proficiency at school, someone showing off would say ‘look no hands’ and someone else would reply: ‘look no teeth’.  Well on our designated cycle routes the pot-holes are so big that it would be more a question of “look no bike … or rider”.
So we invited the people with responsibility for our roads at KCC to come and see for themselves just how bad it was.  We hired a mini-bus and took them on a tour, but it didn’t begin very propitiously.  As our vehicle was weaving around the holes and bucking over the sunken camber like a demented bronco, the main man from the County Council could be heard to say “It’s much worse round where I live.” 
Anyway, having demonstrated as best we could the deplorable situation and demanded “something must be done”, the County Councillor began his mantra of “there is no money for it”. The roads in the county had not been properly maintained for years, and it was estimated that it would require £230 million to bring Kent’s highways up to ’standard’.  So it’s simply not going to be done because “there’s no money for it”.  County Hall tells him to fill in pot-holes, ignore minor roads and concentrate on the main roads. 
Isn’t that, we asked, a bit unfair on areas like ours where there are loads of minor and almost no major roads? Ah well, he explained, it’s all down to central government funding.  Basically the Shire counties have been ‘screwed’ by central government. Whitehall recently changed the rules and now we get money depending on how well we maintain our ‘assets’.  Main roads are classed as assets, minor ones are not. Put simply, the more you maintain your assets the more money you get to maintain them. We stand to lose £13 million if we don’t keep them up to scratch.
Sorry, did we hear right? If the roads are well maintained, you get more money to maintain them, which you don’t really need because they are well maintained. BUT, if they are poorly maintained because you can’t afford the maintenance, you LOOSE the money you really need to carry out that maintenance.  Yep, that makes a lot of sense.  And who determines if they are well maintained or not.  Ah, that will be the Country Council itself.  It ‘self-judges’ its own performance, and then is judged on the self-judging!
By now the collective heads of the parish councillors are spinning.  Perhaps we’ve fallen down one of our own potholes and emerged, Alice like, in some un-wonderland where big is small and less is more. 
"Take some more tea," the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly. "I've had nothing yet," Alice replied in an offended tone: "so I can't take more." "You mean you can't take less," said the Hatter: "it's very easy to take more than nothing.”
On that basis, substituting road repair for tea, we should really be quite pleased.  We can hardly be any worse off than we are.

ends.





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